I had to come to a very scary realization this week. And once I came to it, I had to admit it. To a real person. Because if I didn’t admit it, if I didn’t tell someone, I would push those fears down as long as I could until they bubbled up inside of me and eventually took over my words, my actions, my spirit, and my heart.
So in order to avoid a very ugly emotional breakdown, I decided to deal with the few moments of fear and discuss it my prayer partner. And now, I’m telling you.
Even when God gives me clear direction on an issue, even when I know what He wants me to do, I still wonder if it’s worth it. My exact words in my confession to my prayer partner were, “I know it’s worth it in the end, and I know I’m going to this, but I’m not necessarily ready to do it, to talk about it with others, or to smile about it.
I do recognize the irony of choosing to write about it…but we’re not hear to talk about that today. Continue reading